As I sat at the funeral for an eight year old little boy named Nicholas and his grandparents, Robert Lee Shumake, 68, and Wilene Shumake, 67, the pastor of the missionary baptist church that the entire Shumake family attended was talking about the question we all have thought at some point throughout this tragedy....Why?
The pastor said that he had always told people and heard others make the same comment to him over the years that when they got to Heaven they had a list of questions they would ask God as soon as they got there. The top of the list centers around one word...why? Why does a loving God who wants what is best for us allow such tragedy? Why did God allow a flash flood to take 20 precious family members in a matter of a few minutes and leave these families devastated. Why did God allow the flood to take little Nic, who was adopted as an infant into a loving, Christian family who treasured him and was the church "prankster" who everyone loved, and Wilene who was a Godly woman that others in the church turned to when any need arose, and Robert who was a deacon and considered a pastor's friend.
Then he went on to say that he always thought that as soon as he came before Christ he would ask Him why these things happen, but while preparing and studying what he wanted to say over these 3 family members, he said God impressed upon his heart that when he saw God's face he would not say, "Why?" but instead would say, "Of course." That when we get to Heaven and see God's face, it will all make sense in an instant. We will instantly understand that we only saw a snapshot of the plan. That God's time is not our time. We can't even wrap our minds around the "big picture" so to speak. As Isaiah 55:8 says, "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my way," declares the Lord.
I don't know why tragedies happen. I don't think we will understand it while we are here on earth. I do trust that the God I believe in, the God I pray to, the God I worship...He is in control.
As my pastor said one Sunday morning and it is a comfort to me when things aren't going the way I want them to....NOTHING will ever touch my life that has not gone through God's hands first. Nothing will touch me that hasn't sifted through his fingers. God can take the worst disaster and make it into the biggest blessing. Does it make everything rosy and perfect when it's falling apart? Of course not, but God is still on the throne and that is ultimately all I need to know.
Monday, June 28, 2010
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
A Life Changing Weekend
On June 11, 2010 I woke up like it was any other morning. I went to a friend's house where 3 mornings a week I am lifting weights and working out with several other friends. On my way there I began to hear bits and pieces about the Caddo flooding and that they thought maybe as many as 5 people were missing at Albert Pike. We did half our workout and then set out in the truck to go look at the Caddo River which was higher than I have ever seen it and I've lived here for 14 years. After talking to my friend, Penny, who was camping at the lake and her family are all Lodi first responders/fire dept. she told me that they might be bringing some families to their fire house. I called another friend, Stacy, who lives out there as well and she told me she was going to get food for some of the families. I offered to help and ran home to get changed. Little did I know that the decision to go out and help with what I thought was a minor situation going on would end up being something that would change the way I view everything.
Within 10 minutes of arriving at Pilgrim Rest MBC, I could see that this was much bigger than what I initially was told. Within a few minutes, I was asked to start finding families with missing family members and bring them one at a time to meet with the state police in a room in the back to give their information about their family member. People were huddled in groups...some were crying, some were just in shock, some were excited to see someone they knew...a full range of emotions but you could feel the confusion and anxiety in the air inside and out of the church. The first family that I found with a missing person and visited with while we waited in the hallway for them to be called in found out within a short period of time that their 7 year-old daughter's body had been found. I had about 2 minutes to cry for this family and then had to stand with another couple who showed me their little boys picture (who thank the Lord was found safe a few hours later) and it began to dawn on me that this was going to be like nothing I had ever experienced before.
Throughout the day I talked with family after family who were desperate to find their loved one alive...some multiple family members. Over the course of 4 days, I grew to love many of these families and rarely has an hour go by that one of them is not on my mind. The last 4 families to be at the church waiting on their families were all from different places, some already knew that they had lost part of their family and were waiting on the remaining members to be found...the agony of waiting was written on their faces and you could feel the desperation from them.
Those of us there those days have had time now to look back and reflect and we have talked about how we were sleeping 2 and 3 hours a night over 4 days and yet felt like we had slept, when normally we wouldn't know what to say or do with someone in such a desperate situation...the words seemed to be there. We know that the strength to get through those 4 days was not from us, it was God. He provided all we needed to minister to these families in the worst hours and days of their lives.
Since then, a small group of us attended 3 funerals and 2 visitations for 9 precious family members. We have loved and been loved on by each and every member of these final 3 families that we waited with while they waited on word of their final family member to be found. It is something that has changed each and every one of us. We will not ever view life the same I hope. God had a plan. It is beyond our comprehension and I want to share what I have experienced and learned while attending these 3 funerals and loving these 3 families as soon as I can.
Within 10 minutes of arriving at Pilgrim Rest MBC, I could see that this was much bigger than what I initially was told. Within a few minutes, I was asked to start finding families with missing family members and bring them one at a time to meet with the state police in a room in the back to give their information about their family member. People were huddled in groups...some were crying, some were just in shock, some were excited to see someone they knew...a full range of emotions but you could feel the confusion and anxiety in the air inside and out of the church. The first family that I found with a missing person and visited with while we waited in the hallway for them to be called in found out within a short period of time that their 7 year-old daughter's body had been found. I had about 2 minutes to cry for this family and then had to stand with another couple who showed me their little boys picture (who thank the Lord was found safe a few hours later) and it began to dawn on me that this was going to be like nothing I had ever experienced before.
Throughout the day I talked with family after family who were desperate to find their loved one alive...some multiple family members. Over the course of 4 days, I grew to love many of these families and rarely has an hour go by that one of them is not on my mind. The last 4 families to be at the church waiting on their families were all from different places, some already knew that they had lost part of their family and were waiting on the remaining members to be found...the agony of waiting was written on their faces and you could feel the desperation from them.
Those of us there those days have had time now to look back and reflect and we have talked about how we were sleeping 2 and 3 hours a night over 4 days and yet felt like we had slept, when normally we wouldn't know what to say or do with someone in such a desperate situation...the words seemed to be there. We know that the strength to get through those 4 days was not from us, it was God. He provided all we needed to minister to these families in the worst hours and days of their lives.
Since then, a small group of us attended 3 funerals and 2 visitations for 9 precious family members. We have loved and been loved on by each and every member of these final 3 families that we waited with while they waited on word of their final family member to be found. It is something that has changed each and every one of us. We will not ever view life the same I hope. God had a plan. It is beyond our comprehension and I want to share what I have experienced and learned while attending these 3 funerals and loving these 3 families as soon as I can.
And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
II Corinthians 12:9
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
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We're off and running....
Summer is in full swing and I am loving it!! Haven't had an entire day at home yet and I always enjoy those but we're too busy right now with the fun and sun to care. I'm working Mondays and Wednesdays half a day in June and directing VBS in July so need to get my tail to work on that, but baseball and softball are taking up most of my time right now. From Saturday morning to Monday night...we played, well, I watched my kids play actually...SEVEN games!
He played 2 games on Saturday and won both, then Sunday School and Church for me and Gracen on Sunday morning, back to the ballpark for 2 games that afternoon where we won the Summer Grand Slam for 10 and under. Monday morning I worked out before I went to work for a few hours and then Gracen played and lost out of her league tournament at 5:30 at Caddo Hills and then we were off to Kirby for a double header against Centerpoint for Carson starting at 7:00. Whew!! I'll post a pic from the championship soon.
That night they each had a friend over to spend the night and then I took them all swimming at mom's that afternooon so I did get some down time floating in the pool...except for that I kept getting griped at for floating into the "baseball outfield" aka the deep end!
Today, I worked followed by a mad dash to get to the Arkadelphia waterpark for Deric's birthday, home to piano lessons, dropped them off to go to a friend's fun night at their church and finally home about 7:30 or so. It's been a wild week already! The rest of the week is basically the same.....but I love going and doing with my kiddos while we have the time and opportunities!
I'm pretty sure life is going to get really boring when they are out of the nest and off on their own....I dread it already! :)
He played 2 games on Saturday and won both, then Sunday School and Church for me and Gracen on Sunday morning, back to the ballpark for 2 games that afternoon where we won the Summer Grand Slam for 10 and under. Monday morning I worked out before I went to work for a few hours and then Gracen played and lost out of her league tournament at 5:30 at Caddo Hills and then we were off to Kirby for a double header against Centerpoint for Carson starting at 7:00. Whew!! I'll post a pic from the championship soon.
That night they each had a friend over to spend the night and then I took them all swimming at mom's that afternooon so I did get some down time floating in the pool...except for that I kept getting griped at for floating into the "baseball outfield" aka the deep end!
Today, I worked followed by a mad dash to get to the Arkadelphia waterpark for Deric's birthday, home to piano lessons, dropped them off to go to a friend's fun night at their church and finally home about 7:30 or so. It's been a wild week already! The rest of the week is basically the same.....but I love going and doing with my kiddos while we have the time and opportunities!
I'm pretty sure life is going to get really boring when they are out of the nest and off on their own....I dread it already! :)
Thursday, June 3, 2010
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